Merry Chri...err..Happy Hol...err...HAPPY FREAKIN' FESTIVUS
It's everywhere this year, you know the controversy about calling it Christmas or The Holidays this year. Nobody wants to step on anyone's toes, so they want to change everything around and step on their throats instead.
Don't like The Christmas Parade? Well, choke on this sucka!The war on Christmas started the second the leftover turkey went into the fridge and the onslaught of retail holiday cheer started to reign down upon us. Some said Christmas and some didn't. Go get your Holiday Tree or bake some Holiday Cookies. Wait, that doesn't sound right. You can say Have A Happy Christmas, but you can't say Merry Holiday, well unless you've sloshed down too much of Emeril's Eggnog. Of course you have to be a little incensed when some religion you don't follow is shoved down your throat, but can you have the cake, but pass on the ice-cream, or more bluntly can you have Christmas without the whole Jesus thing? Woo there, did he go there? What would Kanye West do? What would Brian Boitano Do? Regardless of how you feel, we can all agree there's no problems with Festivus. Strippers will feel at home with the aluminum pole. People who hate the whole holiday ordeal will love The Airing of Grievances, and who doesn't enjoy a good round of Feats of Strength? Nobody is forced to do anything they don't want, well, wait a second, maybe they are. Food, yeah that's it, nobody has a problem with food right? On a diet? Damn. Well nothing's perfect and you can't always have it your way (except at Burger King), but that's life. Deal with it.
Posted by monkeyinabox ::: |
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