monkeyinabox: look here....or you could just go through life and be happy anyway

the daily banana

In The Year Twenty-Thirty

01.20.2006

Bend - In The Year 2030

Given the popularity of the Bend 2030 Community Vision, it's time I put in my two cents, in a way that would make Conan O'Brien proud:

monkeyinabox: "It's time, once again, to look into the future."

you the blog reader: "The future, monkeyinabox?"

monkeyinabox: "That's right, you the blog reader. Let's look to the future, all the way to the year 2030."

Falsetto otherworldly wail: In The Year Tweeeenty-Thiiiiirty:

The city of Bend is forced to open the 8th branch of Bend Memorial Clinic due to the shear amount of people suffering lightheadedness and vertigo from the 10,000 roundabouts built within city-limits.

Falsetto otherworldly wail: In The Year Tweeeenty-Thiiiiirty:

Affordable single-family housing becomes a reality; unfortunately all of the houses are built in the center of the roundabouts.

Falsetto otherworldly wail: In The Year Tweeeenty-Thiiiiirty:

With the population now at 3,000,000 people, Oregonians move back to California to escape the traffic jams, insane real-estate prices and the suburbian nightmare and sprawl of Central Oregon.

Falsetto otherworldly wail: In The Year Tweeeenty-Thiiiiirty:

Krispie-Creme donuts finally come to Bend, unfortunately, with the shear number of roundabouts, nobody wants to eat anything round. Coincidentally the 25th Wendy's Hamburgers opens.

Falsetto otherworldly wail: In The Year Tweeeenty-Thiiiiirty:

Rumours of an Olive Garden restaurant are still circulating, but no one knows anything more than that. Hopes of all-you-can-eat breadsticks are still not satisfied.

Falsetto otherworldly wail: In The Year Tweeeenty-Thiiiiirty:

Donald Trump reveals that he alone, was the sole cause of the last 25 years of inflated real-estate prices because The Trump Urban Legend was just too good, not to make it come true.

Falsetto otherworldly wail: In The Year Tweeeenty-Thiiiiirty:

The website for Community Vision 2055 will launch. Unfortunately, it will be called, "Move To Burns, It's Better There".


Posted by monkeyinabox ::: |

Comments

Jake said:

HAHAHA....

That's frickin' hilarious!

My cheesy contribution...

In The Year Tweeeenty-Thiiiiirty: The tourists will have gone home, after the ugly incident where the South Sister belches some lava and kills some 1500 people skiing on Mt. Bachelor.

Or something like that....




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