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the daily banana

Only In America Part 4


from the surreal to the very real, only in America

Sitting here, eating some M&M's, it's easy to kick back, put the feet up and say, ahhhhhhhhh, only in America. Oh wait, not the M&M's and putting the feet up, but rather the day to day experiences.

Just yesterday, my wife and I had some business to do in the Redmond area around dinner time. We wanted to grab a quick bite to eat, and yes, it had been some time since I had indulged in the goodness known as Burger King. Ahhh, you remember right? The epic Triple Whopper tale, but this time I went for something just as good. Order it up, a BK Quad Stacker which is pretty evident in the naming of what it entails. Now while this is a somewhat beastly burger, it's no Triple Whopper in size comparison. That's a good thing. And being called sir when you order these is another treat. Only In America son, Only In America .

If dreaming of super-sized hamburgers doesn't do it for you, then what about super heros? Just when you think reality TV has done it all, along comes another gem: Who Wants To Be A Superhero?. Honestly, it would be good enough with Major Victory dancing while he ran or Fat Momma and her donut utility belt, but when you have someone named Monkey Woman that seals the deal for me:

Super Powers: High-tech weapons and gadgets disguised as bananas.

Of course that's just the basic info. Here's the detailed breakdown:

Monkeywoman has a utility belt and leg holsters full of weapons (a gun, a grenade, smoke bombs and flash charges) and tools (parachute, grappling hook, Swiss army banana, etc.) disguised to look like ordinary bananas. Her weapons inventor has an uncanny way of always supplying her with exactly the right tools for whatever mission she embarks upon. Except for having a little difficulty telling her bananas apart (which can make for an awkward situation), Monkeywoman has never lacked for the solution to any problem with her handy bananas around. She also keeps one real banana on her belt for a snack.

Of course I received the shifty eye from Mrs. Monkey when Monkey Woman appeared on the show, but after watching the first episode Monkey Woman was receiving cheers from Mrs. Monkey as well. Good thing. I didn't want to have to dodge flying bananas every time the show came on.

Seriously, I'd totally buy a Monkey Woman comic book. She'd almost be as cool as Otterpop Man. Ha ha, yeah, bad summer heat humor. What did you come here for some serious insight on the local forest fires? Tisk Tisk. BK Quad Stackers and Reality tv. Only In America miss, Only In America.
Posted by monkeyinabox ::: |


ty said:

Hey Monkey. Are you on vacation or something dude?

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